Nobody has to tell me that the human sense of smell is embarrassingly weak compared to us cats. All I have to do is take a whiff of the stuff my human likes to spray on herself — scents that she thinks make her smell good!
Stinky flowery smells, spices that make my nose hurt and worst of all, those stinging, icky citrus smells! It’s positively disgusting. If it were up to me, the world of perfume would be very different than the way it is now. I would create aromatic awesomeness that a kitty could fully appreciate. In fact, I came up with some prototype perfumes that I think blow doors on anything human created. For your whiffing pleasure, here are some feline friendly fragrances:
Tuna al Fresco
Imagine a wharf in the morning’s early hours with the fishermen unloading their daily catch. The bracing sea breeze ruffles your fur as you take in the fresh tang of the highest quality Bluefin tuna. Grassy undertones finish off this subtly salty blend that will make even the most landlocked cat dream of sandy beaches that echo the wild call of crashing surf.
Sweet Crème Delight
Rich. Bold. Indulgent. This inviting scent is for the kitty who wants the best life has to offer. Full-bodied but not too heavy, the creamy notes carry just a touch of sweetness with hints of honeysuckle and silver vine to entice only the most discerning tomcats.
A Little Bit O’ Nip
This fun fragrance is sure to make you stand out in the clowder! It’s a blend of outdoorsy flavors — freshly mown lawn, peat moss and loam, but infused with that intoxicating catnip aroma. Playful and flirty, like new nip leaves in spring, this scent will rev up the purrs and cause heads to turn.
Fleur de Poulet
You will be positively delicious when you wear this warm, mouthwatering fragrance. It covers the full range of free-range chicken — the light and lively breast meat and sumptuous, succulent dark meat, with surprising, spicy undertones of turkey giblets to keep your admirers guessing. Where’s the fleur, you ask? It’s in the notes of catnip blooms that give this perfume a complexity most poultry scents lack.
Hello, Kitties
Only for cats who crave the spotlight! Fully loaded with feline pheromones, this sultry scent makes you a kitty magnet. The powerful attractants are enhanced with notes of valerian to make you so completely irresistible that you may need to hire a bodyguard. Racy and daring, this fragrance is for cats who aren’t afraid to walk on the feral side.
Check out my Valentine’s Day Collection on Zazzle!
These are hilarious! Fleur de Poulet is Chicken Flower! Got a good laugh from tbese.
MOL! This is awesome. We will take one of each, please! Those descriptions have us sold!
One bottle of Sweet Cream please!
Purrz!
Selina
Those are some pretty heady fragrances! Sparkle had a real nose for perfumes MOL.
Aww, Sparkle. I would take the Catnip one for sure.
Haha! I would totally wear the catnip one! Not too sure about the others, though.
Mes gots to get mes some of that Tuna al Fresco! It would be my signature sent!
Kisses
Nellie
Awesome post Sparkle! We thinks you need to go into business pronto! I would like to try the Sweet Creme Delight! PS: My Human always says that I smell like I am wearing a cologne, I am the best smelling kitty she has had!
I’d use any one of those. Years ago, I tried to get TW to switch that smelly, expensive Ginger Float she used in her bath to something called Tuna Melt but she wouldn’t hear of it.
Oh Faraday’s ALL about the tuna. Do boycats indulge? Is there a bracing aftersha- uh, afterwash of that Tuna al Fresco?
LOL!!!!! I think you have a new business venture here Sparkle…this is genius! We could understand liking any of them….except for the first one….but I can see why cats would like to smell like bluefin tuna.
The Human wants to know: Does *she* have to wear this stuff, or is it to rub on the paw pads and earsicles of kitties? And if the latter, I think you need to develop a few more MANCATLY scents–you know, Back Alley Musk, or Dead Mouse Pour Homme. Ya know?
Mommy says No Way to perfumes…she likes to huff us “au naturel”!
Those purrfumes all sound so good! So much better than what peeps wear. And if you can believe it, our mom says OUR feet smell punky!
Sunday’s video is now making the rounds at the mom’s work.
Brilliant! Zoe would like to order some “Hello, Kitty.” Gracie says it’s “Fleur de Poulet” for her. 🙂
We is lucky kittehs here too..our humom don’t wear no stinky stuff..I thinks I would likes some of them kitty smellys though.. 😉 we getted our Tidy Cat coupons today too..humom was real excited about them pieces of paper so I guess they are a good thing..I think them smelled like you Miss Sparkle..MOL..
I think my kitties would love all of those.
It’s A Little Bit O’ Nip for me every time. You are right once again, Sparkle, the humans are utterly clueless!
The candy cats would like A Little Bit of Nip. Skittles, Snickers and Reese know that would not bother their human’s allergies.
If we smelled like nip, we’d certainly enjoy Mondays a lot better!
Oh Sparkle, you should partner with a designer (like the human stars you know, who have their perfumes) to create some or all of them! I would definitely… make my human wear one of these instead of her perfume!
Delightfully amusing. Our Mom actually uses a body wash, lotion and cologne called Fresh Cream. We think it is pretty nice. Mom likes it when Misty May rubs all over dad’s face and get his after shave in her furs. Sometimes Mom thinks she is being really clever…NOT! She will take one of those perfume flyers from magazines, open it and rub the paper all over us so that the stink gets on our furs. It’s disgusting. Most of the time, even she thinks so! Sheesh!!
We received our Tidy Cats coupons in the mail today. This was one of the best giveaways ever. Thanks, Sparkle!
Purrs and hugs, Lily Olivia, Mauricio, Misty May, Giulietta, Fiona, Astrid, Lisbeth and Calista Jo
That’s funny! My cats like my human perfume…and I think THEY smell just terrific they they are…
You should bottle these and sell them Sparkle! You are quite the entrepreneur! Meow and Namaste!~ Pippy the Feline Yogini
We needed a chuckle today. Mmmm, we’d love eau de nip today but only organic.
We would like to try A Little Bit O’Nip… or maybe Tuna al Fresco ? We’re lucky kitties, Mum doesn’t like much stinky stuff. Purrs
I don’t know Sparkle – I will stick with Eau de Doe for now
Our mama would like to try the hello kitty scent <3
hahahahaha….though we don’t think we could get mom to wear any of those 🙂
What great perfumes! I’d like to order A Little Bit O’Nip 🙂
Great perfume ideas! When should we expect to see them in the stores? 😉
Oh I like the way you think Sparkle……those scents sound quite nice for we felines – subtle (like a cat….ahem) yet boldly professing a desire to stand out in a crowd…..Excellent!
Hugs, Sammy 😉
Excellent ideas for perfume… like the tuna one the best.
Also, thanks for the idea of looking at the painting in the mirror… cool.
Have a great day.
hugs, Bugsy and Knuckles
We think we’d like the nip in particular!
Maybe we’re lucky our human lost her ability to smell over the years she’s had cats–she doesn’t wear anything stinky other than her soap and shampoo! 🙂
We would wear the Tuna
Meowma was reading over our shoulders again. “Hummpff” she said, “catnip smells like skunk”. That proves the human’s smeller is verrry inadequate. Skunk hah! It beats what she wears….Eau de Human.
purrs,
Jasmine, Joey, Eddie & Rosie
What purrfect options you have created!
That gives a whole new meaning to Stinky Goodness!!!
Those perfumes are great, Sparkle. But if we wear them, we risk being licked by every cat around! 🙂
We can just hear the “Hello, Kitties” being advertised with the Old Spice Man’s voice! Did you know that there actually is a perfume for cats called “Oh, My Cat?” The head peep offended a department store saleswoman once by incredulously asking, “Have you ever tried to spray something on a cat?” when the saleslady told her about it.
Sparkle….my sweet smelling friend those would be some mighty fine! Scents…..BUT as you know we cats always always smell divine!
Mom says the tippy top of my head is intoxicating. She always asked what I put on it to smell that good. My theory is every time she passes by me she
rubs my head so I expect my sweet head comes from her hands. BUT DON’T tell her
Hugs madi your bfff
Those look like some mighty great perfumes and such good descriptions. We want to try the tuna al Fresco. Nothing better than the good smell of tuna.
Take care.
Those are SO COOL!!!
Luckily my mum knows how it must feel for us cats because her sense of smell is almost as strong as ours (I’m sure she was a cat in a past life) so she doesn’t over spray herself. She wears a nice vanilla scent which I quite like. 😆
Nip perfumes! Mmmmmmmmmmm!
Now that is an idea we can get behind 🙂
Purrs Georgia and Julie,
Treasure, and JJ
and Angels Tiger and Tillie
Our favourite option has to be Fleur de Poulet!!! Although, we do have one human friend who has a stunning effect on us each time he comes over wearing a particular gentleman’s eau de toilette made by Guerlain!
Purrs,
The Chans
We would love to test the Fleur de Poulet perfume.
Luv Hannah and Lucy xx xx