So The Friskies Internet Cat Video Awards were held on Wednesday. As usual, I sent my human in my place to take photos and scribble down notes. According to her, it was a lot of fun, but in the midst of her telling me about all the festivities, I gleaned something that I had only suspected, but now know for an absolute fact:
Humans really want to be be cats. Like, really, really want to be cats.
Here I present Exhibit A: the “Catify” app that was enthusiastically promoted. It replaces a perfectly good cat face with your human face on your tablet or phone, like some cloning experiment gone wrong.
Next up is Exhibit B: The Treat Stand, with cupcakes, human food platters… and Friskies Party Mix! There were no cats in attendance, so I can only gather that the Party Mix was for the humans.
It was not a Tibetan influence that inspired this chandelier — those are cans of Friskies!
The stage featured two giant cat statues, reminiscent of ancient Egyptian cats, surrounding a video screen. Featuring cats, of course.
On a cat tree in a corner sat the Friskies catuettes, waiting to be given to their new owners.
All this could have been shrugged off as mere feline worship (which, of course, is only our due). Even the cat carrier containing the envelopes with the winners could have fallen into that category. But the entertainment gave way the truth.
At least John Fulton of Must Love Cats just sang original tunes about us kitties and did not go overboard… but things got a little crazy after him.
There was an a cappella group that pretended they were cats.
And there was this guy, dressed up to do an interpretive dance as Nyan Cat. Seriously, I think most of the humans there were dreaming they were cats for a day, although in their hearts they must have known that even a cartoon cat came closer than they did.
At least the award winners seemed to be fairly happy in their human skins. Will Braden, the filmmaker behind Henri le Chat Noir, won a Lifetime Achievement Award.
The $15,000 Grand Prize Winner was Oskar, the blind cat, and his human Mick Szydlowski accepted the award for him. Szydlowski seemed like a genuinely nice guy and he hoped that Oskar’s videos would encourage special needs cat adoption.
Here are all the humans taking credit for their cats’ hard work.
The moment that came closest to the truth was a surprise onscreen cameo by Henri, who pointed out, “Cat video awards should be presented to the cats themselves.” Although in the end, cats were the biggest beneficiaries — 250,000 cans of Friskies were donated to 25 shelters!
As my human was leaving, she noticed that Will Braden had been snagged by the Catify guy.
While around the back, the giant cat statues were being carefully wrapped up for storage. Does this mean we will see The Friskies again in 2013?
See all of Summer’s merch at her Designercat Shop, available on Zazzle.