My Human Answers My Questions Today

In advance of Answer Your Cat’s Questions Day, I’ve been making a list! Let’s see how my human does….

1. What did you do to Binga to make her so cranky? Are you guilty of tortie abuse or something?
Since there’s no such thing as a tortie Somali, I guess you haven’t been around them much. Um, no, she was not abused. Torties come that way, at least some of them. Especially her.

2. How come I’m the only one who competes in cat shows? I know they have Household Pet categories for non-pedigreed cats. I’d love it if Binga and Boodie entered too, then we could all hang out together all day and it’d be lots of fun!
Fun? I don’t think so! A lot of cats, both pedigreed and not, are fine at home, but then you take them to a show and they behave very differently. In fact, in the world of cat shows, there’s a highly scientific, technical term for this: they are called “spook cats.” Binga and Boodie would be spook cats at a show, and no judge wants to handle a cat like that, especially in the Household Pet category. They like friendly, happy cats like you.

3. I love staying in hotels and going to cat shows, but really, do we have to go there in the car? Isn’t there a better way to get there?
Well, I could snap the leash on you and walk you there, but that might take a while. Sorry, there’s no other option — except maybe flying in a plane. We’ll give that a try, maybe in March, and see what you think about that. At least I’ll be able to pet you inside your carrier and give you treats while we’re traveling.

4. Would it be the end of the world if we skipped the bath before a cat show sometimes?
No, it wouldn’t be the end of the world, but you would look messy and poorly groomed and lose points and not bring home any ribbons. Plus you would be a bad example of your breed and embarrass your breeder. So there are still a lot of downsides.

5. Was Sparkle like me?
She looked a little like you — in fact, in some ways, she looked a lot like you! But the two of you have very different personalities. Sparkle was snarky and a little cynical, and you are neither of these. Plus she hated going anywhere, especially the vet, and when Binga whapped her, she whapped Binga right back. You are different in that way too. She did like to sit on my office chair and supervise me… but she was smart enough not to walk on my keyboard, even when I wasn’t looking.

6. How come your boyfriend gives me treats without my having to do anything, but you make me do stuff to get treats from you?
There are two reasons: 1) I’m using the treats to help you learn stuff, and 2) he’s a pushover.

7. Am I really as gorgeous as people keep telling me I am?
Yes.