10 Handy Cat Tips for Humans

I’m just a kitten and I can’t even begin to be as wise as Sparkle was, but I think I can come up with ways to help humans be better servants to kitties! Today I’ve compiled a list of handy tips, most of which humans can use starting right now!

1. The best way to serve a kitty her meals is on a plate. That gives her whiskers room to comfortably spread out, and ceramic or porcelain plates are less likely to cause acne than plastic bowls, or deep bowls.
2. Does your cat keep losing his toys under the sofa? Get a fishnet from the aquarium section of the pet store — it will help you “fish” them out! (I got this one from my friend Sasha.)
3. If you have a cabinet with cleaning supplies and other items that are potentially dangerous to cats, use a childproof lock to keep out your kitties. We are smart and can undo twist-ties, and we can also chew through twine and rubber bands (in fact, rubber bands can be dangerous if we swallow them, so never use them, period). But only use the child proof locks for that. Cats should be allowed in all the other cabinets.
4. The best way to put a cat into a carrier is to place her in backwards. If you try to put her in face-first, she can reach out and grab at the opening and make it really difficult for the both of you. Also, your cat will feed off of your energy, so if you are nervous, she will respond in kind. If you can be calm and matter-of-fact, it makes it less stressful for everyone.
5. If you have a non-plastic carrier, make accidents easier to clean up like this: cut up an old shower curtain to a size that’s a couple inches or so larger than the bottom of the carrier. Place it on the bottom of the carrier so that the extra material goes up the sides, and then put a plush towel over it. That way if the cat is sick in the carrier or goes to the bathroom, it keeps the mess from sinking into the carrier itself.
6. If one cat is mad at another cat who came home from the vet, put some baby powder on a towel and rub it on both their rear ends. That way they will smell alike and it should help end the hissing. (I found this one on Facebook from a smart human that my human knows.)
7. Let your cat tell you when he wants to be petted. Reach out with your arm and hand relaxed, fingers lightly extended. Let him sniff your fingers, and if he rubs against them, it is okay to proceed. This is a good way to approach cats you don’t know well too. If you are unsure of the cat, it’s best to lay your hand on a flat surface, palm up, to make your approach as passive and unthreatening as possible. If a cat is really shy, you can hold a pen for them to sniff, or the part of your glasses that go over your ears (like Jackson Galaxy does in My Cat From Hell). Remember: cats always prefer to be the ones in control when it comes to physical contact.
8. Don’t bother meowing to us kitties. You can just talk in your regular human language. Meowing isn’t actually a language with words. We do understand a few human words, like “food,” “treats,” and our name, but mostly we pay attention to your tone of voice and body language, and that’s what you should pay attention to if you want to better communicate with your cat.
9. If you play really active games with your cat and then feed him right before bedtime, there’s a better chance he will sleep through the night and not have the nighttime crazies.
10. Marinate cat toys in a tub of catnip so they always stay fresh. I hear many of you are already familiar with this one… but how many of you are actually doing it?