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You are here: Home / Diary / You Can’t Win ‘Em All

You Can’t Win ‘Em All

March 18, 2010 By: Sparkle Cat14 Comments

I was really excited the other day when I got an envelope from Writer’s Digest.
Last year I entered their International Self-Published Book Awards in the humor category. The great thing about that is that I entered under my own name and did not let my human take any credit, like she usually tries to do. See? The letter is addressed to me only:

I bet I was the only kitty who entered!

I wondered if they had a ceremony, and if I should be preparing an acceptance speech.

I want to thank all the cats who asked me for advice - they were the ones who made it possible.

But then I started to read the letter…. Wait a minute! I didn’t win! According to them, “Competition was particularly fierce this year and we could only award one grand prize and ten category prizes.” I quickly flipped to the judge’s commentary. They rate you on a scale from 1 (poor) to 5 (excellent). I got a 5 for grammar (of course), and they loved my cover photograph and layout… except for the chapter font, which had “a rather odd, overlapping quality to it that made it hard to read.” My stupid human sent in an old copy of the book before the font was fixed! So as a result I only got a 4 for structure and design. Never mind that she would have missed the deadline if she had waited for the new font — she should have been prepared. I thought I trained her better than that.

I demand a recount!

My fur is a little ruffled over this whole thing. I think I will let my human take the credit for my loss.

Can't my human do ANYTHING right?

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Comments

  1. Lin says

    March 19, 2010 at 2:38 pm

    It’s their loss, Sparkle. I think the fact that you wrote the book, got it published, and entered the contest was incredible enough! I’m very impressed on that alone. 🙂

    Reply
  2. Daisy the Curly Cat says

    March 19, 2010 at 4:19 am

    Don’t worry, Sparkle. We already know you are a winner.

    Reply
  3. Rumblepurr says

    March 18, 2010 at 10:38 pm

    You take top prize in my book, Miss Sparkle!!

    Reply
  4. Teri and the cats of Furrydance says

    March 18, 2010 at 9:03 pm

    ruffled furs can make you cranky…you need a spa day!

    Reply
  5. Fin says

    March 18, 2010 at 9:01 pm

    It’s the price we have to pay for human staff. I’m sure you should have won!

    Reply
  6. Rebecca says

    March 18, 2010 at 7:54 pm

    You’re first in our hearts, Sparkle. 😉

    Reply
  7. BeadedTail says

    March 18, 2010 at 7:34 pm

    We’re sorry you didn’t win Sparkle but we’re proud of you for trying! Better luck next time!

    Reply
  8. Susan Helene Gottfried says

    March 18, 2010 at 4:30 pm

    Bummer! But at least your human was brave enough to enter… She’s one up on me!

    Reply
  9. Marg says

    March 18, 2010 at 9:08 am

    Sparkle, that really is too bad but surely you can try again and we all know you will win next time. We love your blog and so we know you are great at writing. Keep up the work.

    Reply
  10. JaneA says

    March 18, 2010 at 8:47 am

    Aw, Sparkle, I’m sorry you didn’t win. Here’s a *gentle pettie* as a consolation prize. You know all of us at the Paws and Effect Gang love you. 🙂

    Reply
  11. Grace says

    March 18, 2010 at 8:25 am

    Blame it on the human, yeah, yeah, that’s the ticket LOL

    Reply
  12. CatLadyDiary says

    March 18, 2010 at 7:52 am

    Well, she’ll never make that mistake again!!!

    Reply
  13. The Creek Cats says

    March 18, 2010 at 7:27 am

    Awww! Sparkle, you are still a winner in our book!!

    Reply

Trackbacks

  1. Looking For 1,000! says:
    March 19, 2010 at 5:01 pm

    […] I can’t wait to get to 1,000 and was wondering what to do to celebrate when that happens. After some careful thought, I came up with a great idea: I will give the thousandth fan to join my page a PAWtographed copy of my first book, Dear Sparkle: Advice From One Cat to Another (which has won some awards, even if it didn’t get an award from Writer’s Digest)! […]

    Reply

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