Advice – September 2011

Dear Sparkle,
My human never pays any attention to me. In fact, all she ever seems to care about are these pieces of cloth that are stretched across wooden frames or some large pieces of paper. She spends hours scribbling on these things with colored sticks. Frankly, I think that is an odd way to occupy oneself, but I figured I’m game for anything, so I went along with it. I tried to catch the sticks while she was using them, but she pushed me away. Then I tried to touch the papers and the cloths and she got mad. One night she left the sticks out and I had lots of fun knocking them off the table and scattering them all over the room. Well, she did not like that very much either! In fact, she does not even like it when I rub up against the stand where she does her weird color play — she thinks I might push it over! Anyhow, to be honest, I really don’t care about this dumb coloring thing. I just want her to play with me sometimes. Any suggestions?
Signed,
Playful in Provincetown

Dear Playful,
You don’t say how long you and your human have lived together, nor do you say how you came to be with her, but I get the impression that she has the mistaken belief that we cats are low-maintenance creatures who need little attention or companionship. She probably expects you to spend your day sleeping, eating and looking out the window. Granted, those are all very nice activities and quite enjoyable, but if that was all our lives were about, we would be awfully bored! And that is exactly your problem. You have no stimulation. You haven’t mentioned any cat toys or nip, so I assume you have none. Otherwise, why would you need to play with those coloring sticks of your human’s?

I think one reason your overtures have fallen flat is because you are using the wrong venue in which to express yourself. Your human does not consider her papers, canvasses and colored sticks compatible with your kind of play, so you need to find other ways of dropping hints. Are there any small knickknacks around the house that you can bat around? How about in the bathroom — are there any hair clips or ties you can use as toys? Maybe if you walk up to your human with a hair clip in your mouth and drop it at her feet, she will get the idea that you would like to have a little more interaction with her. Racing around the house at odd hours and screaming may also hint that you are in need of some activity. If these tactics fall flat, then you can always try the one that never fails: capturing small prey. Next time a nice-sized cricket or beetle — or even better, a mouse — finds its way into your home, catch it and bring it to your human while it is still at least half alive. While this may not inspire your human to play with you — although it would, if she really understood us cats — it will get her attention. And if you drop it onto the table, next to her colored sticks, you will definitely see some action.

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