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You are here: Home / Advice / Advice – September 2010

Advice – September 2010

August 20, 2010 By: Sparkle Cat18 Comments

Dear Sparkle,
I am being driven insane by the human kitten! It was okay when he was just lying around in his crib or being held by the grown-up humans — I could go over and check him out. Usually he smelled pretty good, unless his wearable litter box was messy (what is it with humans? Can’t they housetrain their young?). But lately he has begun walking… and running! And more often than not I seem to be the focus of his attention. I don’t like this one bit. If I let him near me, he grabs my fur or pulls my tail and sometimes it kind of hurts. So I do the most logical thing — I run away. Fortunately, I am much faster and more agile than he is, so I escape pretty easily. But I am getting way more exercise than I am accustomed to, or want. Is there anything I can do to get this kid to cool his heels, at least when I’m around?
Signed,
Not a Toy!

Dear Not a Toy,
Oh no, it sounds like the human kitten has reached the most annoying age, at least for kitties: the toddler stage. This is where they are mobile and curious, but they just don’t understand very much. This means they get into a lot of trouble and they don’t know yet how to treat kitties and other living things. There really is not much you can do about the one you live with, except to avoid him unless the grown-up humans are very carefully supervising the both of you. That way, if he is too rough on you, you can scream for help and somebody will be right there to come to your aid. If the grown-up humans are distracted and not paying too much attention to the human kitten, you will have to rely on the fact that, as you mentioned, you are faster and more agile than he is. Jump on the highest surfaces you have available — hopefully your human has a cat tree for you. If not, you will have to make do with counters, mantles and the tops of entertainment centers. Or you can hide behind furniture, in places too small for the human kitten to reach. If he can’t get to you, chances are this will cause him to start crying in frustration, and if this happens, feel free to add your voice to the noise. It will get the grown-up humans’ attention even quicker and hopefully they will fetch the kid and you can have some peace.

Unfortunately, human kittens grow a lot more slowly than young cats, so this problem is bound to go on for much longer than you would like. But with any luck, the grown-up humans will train him to be nice to you, and eventually he will find other things to occupy his time besides bothering you. I imagine that at this point, you are probably a little annoyed that your humans brought this guy home to begin with, but don’t worry — if you live long enough, you will have the last laugh. When the kid becomes what is known as a “teenager,” he will make the adult humans’ lives as miserable as yours is right now.

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Comments

  1. Rebecca says

    September 25, 2010 at 2:58 pm

    That is very good advice Sparkle. We have one of these “human kittens” in our family now, but it will be a little while before she is mobile.

    Reply
    • Fat Balloon says

      October 1, 2010 at 6:17 pm

      I’m lucky my human kitten is nice to me. She even brushes me! Sometimes she’ll run around yelling trying to scare me on purpose but not too often. Her mom nips that right in the bud! Cat loving parents shouldn’t let their human kittens terrorize the resident kitty!

      Reply
  2. vange says

    September 7, 2010 at 9:59 pm

    I suggest the judicious use of claws.

    Reply
  3. Pricilla says

    August 30, 2010 at 9:37 am

    Very sage advice indeed

    Reply
  4. Layla Morgan Wilde says

    August 24, 2010 at 3:31 pm

    Wearable litterbox! Thanks for my LOL today.

    Reply
  5. Toby & Leia says

    August 23, 2010 at 7:18 am

    Wow, are we ever glad we don’t have any of those here! Pawsome advice as always, Sparkle.

    Reply
  6. casbahkitten says

    August 20, 2010 at 4:49 pm

    Good advice! We’re lucky not to have any human kittens in our family!

    Reply
  7. The Island Cats says

    August 20, 2010 at 4:11 pm

    Wow, that was some good advice, Sparkle. We’re happy that there aren’t any of those human kittens around our house.

    Reply
  8. Fisher says

    August 20, 2010 at 3:43 pm

    Can you stay close to the computer? I think the human kitten is not allowed in that area. Hope so, anyway.

    Reply
  9. Jacqueline says

    August 20, 2010 at 2:21 pm

    You are such a smart girl, Sparkle with very wise ideas; we are all very lucky to have the benefit of your advice!…Happy weekend, beautiful friends…xoxo…Calle, Halle, Sukki

    Reply
  10. Amy & The House of Cats says

    August 20, 2010 at 1:09 pm

    Sparkle that is great advice – and makes us happy there are no human kittens at our house!

    have a great weekend!

    Reply
  11. BeadedTail says

    August 20, 2010 at 11:57 am

    Very good advice Sparkle! We’re so glad we don’t have any human kittens around here!

    Reply
  12. Katnip Lounge says

    August 20, 2010 at 9:21 am

    Sparkle, Great Advice! We had a Grandkitten here a while back and poor Salem learned first hand about the tail yanking thing…

    Reply
  13. Sniffie and the Florida Furkids says

    August 20, 2010 at 6:55 am

    Great advice. We stay far away from human kittens.

    Sniffie and the Florida Furkids

    Reply
  14. Mishkat says

    August 20, 2010 at 5:42 am

    Very good advice, Sparkle. Those small humans can be such pests – we are glad not to have any around here.

    Reply
  15. Marg says

    August 20, 2010 at 4:50 am

    Great advice Sparkle. Those human kittens are most annoying. Hope that cat can manage to stay away from that meddling kid.
    Have a great day.

    Reply
  16. Seth and Harvey says

    August 20, 2010 at 4:34 am

    Seth here- Ha one of our humans acts like a kitten and she summink like 8.
    Harvey here- Hey dont take about my human like that!

    Reply
  17. Brian says

    August 20, 2010 at 4:26 am

    That sure was an excellent summary to the trials of human kittenhood!

    Reply

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