Dear Sparkle,
We are two kitties who live together but don’t really like each other much. We spend most of our days ignoring each other, napping, and watching Bird TV in opposite sides of the house. We especially give each other space at mealtimes — no food stealing allowed! We do not share anything, so you are probably a little surprised that we are writing to you together. But there is one thing we do agree on: our human is driving us nuts, trying to get us to be friends! She keeps doing totally annoying things, like bringing us together and petting us at the same time (one of us hissed and the other ran away), putting us both on the bed next to her (the moment she falls asleep, we go to different corners of the bed), and giving us treats together (this almost always results in smacky paws). We think it is pretty clear that we will never be best friends, so why is our human so dense, and how can we make her stop her silly attempts to make us get along?
Signed,
Oil and Water
Dear Oil and Water,
I know humans who would be grateful for you two — they live with cats who have turned their households upside down with their clash of wills. You kitties, on the other hand, have learned to coexist peacefully without having to resort to claws. Yet your unappreciative human keeps insisting that you kiss and be pals. Yuck. If she had any sense whatsoever, she would be grateful you guys don’t beat up on each other.
This is a touchy situation, since the more antipathy you show towards each other, the harder your human will work to make you be friends. In fact I had to think really hard to come up with a solution to your dilemma. I don’t know if any kitty has ever used this tactic before, but give it a try and let me know if it works: the next time your human attempts to get you cats to buddy up, instead of getting mad at each other, get mad at her! After all, she’s the one who is being annoying. I’m not saying go feral on her or anything, just both of you give her some smacky paws without claws. Maybe hiss at her a little. Then run off into your hiding places. When she gives up on trying to cajole you out of where ever you have gone, just go about your day, ignoring each other as if nothing ever happened. Your human sounds like a persistent one, but once you start directing your ire at her (which is really where the problem is coming from), maybe she will be more concerned about ruining your relationship with her instead of creating some faux friendship between you two. When it comes to us kitties, humans need to realize “if it ain’t broke, don’t fix it!”

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The peeps used to have to keep Nicky and Autumn is separate rooms cos they hated each other. When they were home, they’d TRY to keep the door open but they’d wind up fighting. That bean should be happy they don’t kill each other.
Sparkle, you are such a wise Ladycat. Good advice.
We kinda have that here–but not too bad. Uncle MaxMaxx does think he’s the Head ManCat and like to bop our heads sometimes–then in the next moment, he giving us a bath. Hmm. Maybe it’s not too bad at all.
Once again, Sparkle, excellent advice! Humans just want everybuddy to be furiends, and sometimes that just doesn’t work.
You gave wonderful advice, but going a little feral might be kind of funny.
We are snuggle buddies so don’t have this problem but you gave great advice Sparkle!
OMC !!! I’m so lucky kitty !!! I don’t need to deal with this situation : )
xoxo
We think Oil and Water should sometimes stay near each other JUST often enough and JUST close enough so that Mom doesnt feel she needs ta do anythin annoying.
Sparkle
You advise is spot on to Oil and Water!
purrs
>^,,^<
♥Abby♥Boo♥Ping♥Jinx♥Grace♥
Dear Sparkle
Your advice is spot on!
Kozmo and me mostly ignores each other. Sometimes we fights. Since Daddy stopped trying to make us be freindly, we has slept together sometimes.
Kisses
Nellie
Oh that is such good advice. That human needs to mind her or his own business. I bet if she would leave the two alone, that they might become friends of some sort. That is the way it happens around here. We like the way you think Sparkle. Take care.
Umm… I know what you mean. My human wants me to be friends with Ichiro and Gemini but they are beneath me! So why should I? Fortunately she does not insist or make us do things together (although Ichiro often horns in on my toys)…
I agree Sparkle, that not broken stuff doesn’t need fixin!
The publicist figures as long as the Farm cats are not trying to kill each other she is good with it.
You are so wise, Sparkle! Are you drawing on your PURRsonal experience PURRhaps?
yep…sometimes there is no point in disturbing the peace trying to make everyone get along. 🙂
We are both good friends so Mum doesn’t need to worry about us – we do have the odd hiss but doesn’t everyone – human’s included!
Luv Hannah and Lucy xx xx
Our mum doesn’t get that trouble. Her biggest problem is trying to survive being crushed under our combined weight of 35 lbs because we both want to nap on her.
Maybe it’s good I’m an only child – I gets all the attention and I don’t have to put up with a roomie I don’t like.
What a silly human!
Our mom says she’d have loved it if angel Annie and Nicki had just ignored each other and co-existed in relative peace.
Nothing wrong with NOT being best buddies!
We’re just trying out our noo google reader and it works! xx