Dear Sparkle,
My human came home with a kitten a few days ago and guess what? I actually like the kid! He’s funny and fun and since he’s a Maine Coon mix and already four months old, he’s not too small or fragile. I can tell already we are going to be great pals. So what’s the problem? My human is the problem! She is getting in the way. Because the little guy is new and still so young, he needs to be shown the ropes and taught right from wrong. For example, last night he jumped on the bed like he belonged there — which he doesn’t, quite yet. So I hissed at him and bopped him one in the face. From the way my human acted, you would have thought I had tried to murder him: “How could you?” “He’s just a baby!” etc., etc. The kitten? He jumped off the bed and 30 seconds later he had forgotten all about the whap and was digging a dust bunny out from under the dresser (he does have weird ideas about what constitutes a toy). Another time, the kitten stole one of my toys so I jumped him — and my human screamed at me! What can I do to make her stop coddling this kitten? It can’t be good for him, and it is certainly annoying me.
Signed,
Ticked Off Top Cat
Dear TOTC,
Humans (yours especially) don’t get the whole kitten training thing. It is a good thing you do, otherwise this pipsqueak would grow up spoiled and self-centered and he would never understand that since you came first, you set the pace in your relationship with him. One of the issues here is that humans never whap their offspring, or at least it is very much frowned upon. I know you may disagree with this approach, but it actually works for humans because their thinking processes are deep and complex. Whapping a human kitten might cause him to grow up with all sorts of unhappy psychological problems. We cats are fortunate in that our thinking contains far fewer shades of gray, and we are pretty much surface creatures: what you see is what you get (with an occasional surprise to keep things interesting). So whapping, or even a full body slam when deemed necessary, works just fine for feline youngsters. Your human, not realizing that cats think so differently from humans, doesn’t get that.
Your best plan is to establish a partnership with the kitten (with you as senior partner, of course). This should be easy to do, because even though you are doling out the discipline, you are also letting him do the really fun stuff that your human doesn’t like: jumping on the kitchen counters, climbing up the curtains, noshing on carelessly left out food, etc. The kitten will soon figure out who really has his back. And by the way, if your human gets upset at any of the kitten’s so-called “misbehavior” and starts getting loud, maybe you should give her a whap to keep her in line.
2022 Somali Cat Calendar Starring Summer Samba
See all of Summer’s merch at her her Zazzle Designercat Shop
Hi Sparkle,
“…noshing…” 🙂
Aside from understandable jealousy, I suppose there is some truth in an older cat knowing how to properly set boundaries for a young newcomer – or at least the way the older cat likes cats to behave in his house.
As long as the new cat isn’t in danger or getting over-scolded by the long-time cat resident, it’s probably healthy for the younger cat to be taught the ropes by the older cat. Us humans can’t assume we know better than the older cat’s instincts on the matter.
Good observations.
=^-^= Hairless Cat Girl=^-^=
Excellent advice Sparkle. Stumbled upon this blog…so glad that I did.
Good advice, Sparkle, you have to make sure these youngsters know who’s in charge from the outset, not to mention the humans (when necessary).
That sounds like very good advice, Sparkle. We would not know how to reply to this question because the cats that came after we did are all seniors. The human ‘kits’ are all growed up before any of kitties got here. So, in case we ever do get a kitten or two, we’ll save your advice.
Purrs,
Mindy
Moe
Cookie
Mike
you always have great advice, Sparkle. we especially like the last line 🙂
Pip, Smidgen, Minnie, Hollie
Fabulous advice, Sparkle!
You really should offer a correspondence course for humans.
; ) Katie
me thinks Whapping is purrfectly the right way to trains young. Human Mom’s don’t thinks that!
Me wonders why….
Kisses
Nellie
What wonderful advice Sparkle!! The Human sent it along to the Dad of Aggie and Wally and Madie Mitten Kitten (not that he tries to protect M3K–he’s fine with A&W showing her that they’re the boss of her).
Sparkle
You’re brilliant I say just brilliant.
purrs
>^,,^<
♥Abby♥Boo♥Ping♥Jinx♥Grace♥
Great advice Sparkle! Around here I still can’t whap my little sisfur cause Mommy thinks she’s still a “kitten”. It’s awful.
Purrs,
Isabella
Sparkle that is some wise advice the humans think in terms of their own experience and feelings and do not always think in terms of cat ways so this was useful to explain those differences for how cat hierarcy is imposed.
Hi Sparkle! Mistletoe here. I kept the twins in line when they came home. Now these big orange and white mancats still think I’m bigger. That works well, for me. Now Hitch, he was older and had been living by his wits, out in the world. I don’t know how he survived, but he didn’t take instruction very well then, and he still has a lot of nerve. When it comes to the human kittens, whupping them isn’t a good idea. For some reason that makes them believe it’s alright to whup on those smaller than them. That could mean you, or me, or any other fursiblings. Bad idea for the humans to whup or swat as a rule of paw. My human kitten got swatted twice. Once when he was playing with a cool pluggy thing that stuck in the wall and once when he kept running in to the road. My huMom says she needed to make a quick impression. My not furever home had a lot of swatting, thumping and hitting. That’s bad for kittens. Very bad.
Great advice as usual! You should write a book!
Actually I have written a book — two, in fact! Here is my Amazon author’s page:
http://www.amazon.com/Sparkle-the-Cat/e/B002E1CH86/
Great advice as usual. I love your advice column.
hugs, Max
Sparkle, Sassy here. Great advice on training the young one. Oh, how I wished I had done a better job with the Spotted Airhead!
Excellent advice. Because you know in the future the kit will know who’s in charge.
Great advice Sparkle. Can’t wait to see pictures of the new kitten and to hear more stories!
Great advice, Sparkle!! My boys whap me when I give them too much tummy rub. I learn a lot and be careful not to misbehave..
Very sage advice, Sparkle!
Candy & EK sure got their share of thwocks when they were kittens. Gotta keep them young whippersnappers in their place. There’s only ONE boss kitty in this house. *preens*
Good advice….mom says that part of our job in helping to raise the foster monsters around here to is keep them in line – and that means sometimes they get whapped. There are rules and they gotta learn them!!
Sparkle as always your advice is “paw” on!!!!
I am glad though that I don’t have to contend with a kitten, tolerating Dakota is enough for me!
Love, Cody
I like how you touched on the main difference between human brains and cat brains: the Limbic System. Humans have waaay too much gray matter which is why it’s sometimes hard to decide what to have for supper. Cats do not have that problem.
Thanks for reminding us how wise you are Sparkle! Great advice!
Definitely good advice, Sparkle. The mom remembers Chumley used to bop Annie on the head when she’d horn in on his playtime with the human. Fortunately, our human found that quite entertaining and didn’t get upset about it. ;-P
BTW, the problem with too many kids today, in our human’s opinion, is that they HAVEN’T been whapped when they should have been. Not beaten, just a good smack on the butt when needed.
Kittens will always test the boundaries, it is important for TOTC to keep the new youngster in line and show him (gently) who is boss…just maybe not in front of the humans 😉
Excellent advice!!!
The Florida Furkids and Lexi
pee ess – we vote every day!!
If the kitten isn’t shown that they rank well below cat(s) already living there they will never learn that they aren’t No.1 in the scheme of things.
Luv Hannah and Lucy xx xx
We love this post. If the darn humans would whap the human babies a lot more, we would have a better world. We totally agree. That was some great advice to form a partnership. Hope all have a great day.
By the way, Sparkle, you sure have Two Two’s number with your comment yesterday about not seeing her taking it easy. She never does take it easy.
We conPUR with Diamond! Excellent advice as usual!
Me thinks humans should whap their kittens more. Most are rude and like to pull my tail…
As usual, most excellent advice Sparkle. This is exactly how I was brought up by Stran. A firm and loving paw. I have tried the same when the baby ninjas arrived but they got everywhere so maybe I hissed a lot….