One of the things my human was told at last week’s Meet Purina Event was that physiologically, dogs and humans are very similar. Which makes sense — they are both sort of stiff and awkward, not graceful and flexible like us kitties. Plus they both need more carbs in their diet than we cats do (now, if only someone would make them eat healthier carbs…). Both are good at aerobic activity (dogs run down their prey and most humans — when they are not sitting on the couch — gravitate towards walking and the treadmill for exercise before they think of picking up dumbbells). We cats, on the other hand, excel at anaerobic activities — we sprint, leap and ambush our prey!
But what they did not mention at the Purina event (because the human talking was a dog guy) is that we cats have brains that are more similar to a human’s than a dog’s! You know what that means, right? Humans are smarter than dogs! Who knew? Plus the areas in our brains that rule emotion are identical to humans, so we feel things the same way they do. This means that cats and humans are very complex and interesting creatures when it comes to the way we think and experience emotion. I have only been able to identify three emotions in dogs: happy, unhappy and guilty. Fortunately for us cats, in spite of our colorful emotional world, we do not experience guilt.
Where am I going with all this? I think I have cracked the code to human training! Even though humans and cats have brains that are similar, humans tend to react to the physical things we do — and since their physiology is so much like a dog’s, they tend to treat us the same way they might treat a dog! That is why they are so confused! Since we cats would never make the same silly mistake, we are already pretty good at manipulating humans to do our will. But with this extra bit of knowledge at our clawtips, we can take it to the next level and train humans faster and more efficiently than ever before!
You would think I would want to keep this information Top Secret and only between us cats, but I don’t! I want to spread the word so that humans fully understand how alike we are on a mental and emotional level. You know why? Because then they will start training themselves to better serve us: when they use their brains to relate to us better, we reward them for their behavior, which encourages them to keep up the good work! So they are making most of the effort while we kitties are reaping the rewards.
Am I onto something or what? I know some of you kitties have instinctively grasped this and are already using it to your advantage. If you have some success stories, do tell!